The pandemic has made necessary the need to social distance and spend more time at home. For many of us, this means spending more time in the company of loved ones. While this may afford the opportunity for building stronger relationships, it may also produce just the right amount of tension to create less than stellar moments. Moments when we may not have felt appreciated, listened to, or seen. Or, others where we overreacted, said things we did not mean and wished we could have take back, but cannot. Instead of berating yourself for wrongdoings, try using this simple mindful phrase "forgive, investigate and invite" to navigate these experiences.
The practice of mindfulness helps us to understand that the mistakes we and others make are not signs of personal failings, but rather part of the human experience and opportunities for learning. This understanding helps us to get back to a space of balance and connection. If we have been the transgressor, we can use this phrase to remind ourselves to set our intention and to "forgive” ourselves for what may have been said. Remembering that we are not perfect; we are doing the best that we can, and that we often make mistakes out of confusion, ignorance, or intense emotions. We can then go on to “investigate” where we went wrong, what impact it had and how we can change our response in the future, to learn from this experience. Lastly, we move on to “invite” ourselves to repair the transgression. This can be done in the form of a heartfelt apology.
The practice of “forgive, investigate and invite” is a vehicle for healing, connection, and growth that you can use with anyone for whom you care. Practice it often.
Source: Mindful.org
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